Interviews as Win/Win or No Deal

We live in a world that sees most things through a win/lose lens. If you don’t “win” the interview, then you must have lost. That’s the common belief.

But after years of interviewing, mentoring, and being interviewed myself, I’ve realised this thinking is completely wrong. Interviews aren’t win/lose. They’re about alignment.

If you don’t get the job, you’re not losing in the long term - you’ve avoided a mismatch. And if a company doesn’t hire you, they’re not losing either - they’ve avoided bringing in someone who doesn’t fully align with their goals.

The best way to frame it is Covey’s principle: win/win or no deal.

Why Misalignment Hurts Everyone

Think about it: what happens if you somehow “win” the job but there’s no real alignment?

• You as the candidate: You’ll spend your days working on a product you’re not thrilled about, surrounded by values that don’t match yours. That excitement to dive deep into the details. Something all good engineers need, just won’t be there. And without that curiosity, bugs creep in, you don’t care about PRs, quality suffers, and you’ll likely feel stuck and unhappy.
• The company: They end up with someone who has the skills on paper but isn’t truly engaged. Someone who doesn’t understand, or doesn’t care to understand, the product. That’s not a long-term win for them either.

In short, misalignment is a lose/lose disguised as a win.

The Interview Isn’t About Impressing

Because we’ve been taught the win/lose model, many candidates approach interviews thinking: “My job is to impress the interviewer at all costs.”

But that’s backwards. The real goal is to find out whether there’s alignment between you and the company.

• Do their goals excite you?
• Do your values resonate with how they build products?
• Can you see yourself growing there?

If the answer is no, then walking away is the right outcome. It’s not a loss. It’s clarity.

My Experience on Both Sides

Early in my career, I joined a company because I “won” the interview. The offer was there, and I was proud of it. But within months, I realised their engineering culture was the opposite of mine. They moved slow and didn’t care about maintainability, testing, or accessibility. I cared deeply about those things.

On the other side, as an interviewer, I’ve seen strong candidates who were technically brilliant but didn’t show real interest in the product. Hiring them would have been easy. But long term, I knew it wouldn’t work, for them or for us. Saying no in those cases wasn’t rejection, it was protection.

Why Alignment Matters at Every Level

• Juniors: Don’t chase a job just to prove you can land one. The wrong environment will slow your growth more than waiting for the right one.
• Mid-levels: You’re starting to shape your career direction. Choose a place where your trajectory matches theirs.
• Seniors: You need alignment at the strategic level. Otherwise, you’ll spend more energy fighting cultural battles than building great systems.

Recap

• The world frames interviews as win/lose.
• In reality, they’re about alignment: win/win or no deal.
• Misalignment hurts both sides, even if you “win” the job.
• It’s not about impressing the interviewer, it’s about discovering if you belong there.

Final Thoughts

Adopting the win/win or no deal mindset changed everything for me. It takes away the fear of rejection and replaces it with clarity.

As engineers, we know that forcing systems to work together when they don’t belong leads to brittle solutions. The same is true in our careers.

So next time you walk into an interview, remember: you’re not there to win or lose. You’re there to discover alignment. If it’s a win for both sides, brilliant. If not, it’s no deal - and that’s the best outcome you could ask for.